Showing posts with label Humorous Games. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humorous Games. Show all posts

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Great Moments in Gaming: The Onyxia Wipe Video

a quick break from actual gaming by Renzie Baluyut

I don't know if you've already seen this video, but I just did a few months back.

Backgrounder: if you've been playing World of Warcraft, then you know that the later storyline brings in Onyxia, this big-ass black dragon boss, who has decided to take the southern part of Dustwallow Marsh as her lair.

It takes a massive effort to bring Onyxia down, with guilds organizing large raiding parties still getting wiped. Onyxia on her own is tough enough, but adventurers also have to deal with all kinds of Black Dragonspawn- among them, Black Dragon Whelps. Many, many whelps.

Now here's a disturbingly hilarious video of one such guild who had come knocking on Onyxia's lair. And promptly got wiped. Thanks to Alachas1985 for capturing this moment in viral video form- truly one of the greatest moments of gaming. Ever. Take a look.



Here's a transcription of what went down. Mind you, if you it's filled with expletives- so a word to the sensitive ones. Just had to stay faithful to the original material, is all. With that out of the way...

Odd groups go to the left, even groups go to the right. That means 1, 3, 5, 7 - left, 2, 4, 6, 8 - right. Seven and Eight are Whelp Groups.

Okay, now listen the fuck up: you're going to DPS very very slowly. Now... and by slowly, I mean fucking slow.

If you get aggro, it means you're going to lose 50 DKP 'coz you didn't know what the fuck to do!

And watch the fucking tail!

If you get kicked into the whelps, you lose 50 DKP again- for not being where the fuck you were supposed to be.

There is no aggro reset. The only... there's some shit about an aggro reset when some people don't know how to manage their aggro.

After 2 Sunders, you can basically start doing damage to it. Assuming you know how Aggro works, you son't over-Aggro.

OK, nuke it, DOT it, help the whelp groups...

When it's in phase 2, nuke it as hard as possible. You want to get it down as fast as possible. Have DOTs up on- on every time. 2 rows: Shadow Word: Pain, Warlock Curses, Rend, everything.

I don't see enough DOTs, more DOTs now! Come on, more DPS! Hit it like ya mean it! You'll get time to rest in Phase 3 while (down) getting Aggro.

Remember, save your Aggro-reducing abilities for when it lands. That means Feign Death, Vanish, -erm- fucking Fade, anything that you can use to reset Aggro.

At 40%, you will stop DOTs. Until then, you will throw more DOTs. Throw more DOTs, more DOTs, more DOTs. Come on, more DOTs! 'K, stop DOTs.

Now hit it very hard. And very fast!

Lee, run to the center! Mogrus, run to the center! Foresight, run to the center! Sarp, run to the center! Isis, run to the center! Whatever the fuck you do, don't stand next to other people!

Mogrus, center! Just heal me.

Lee, do NOT..! Go away from the head, Lee! Go away!
'K, DPS! Slowly! Come here, you fucking cunt! Watch the tail!

(Someone else) Whelps. (Somebody else) Crushim was Feared into...

WHO THE FUCK WAS THAT? Crushim, what the FUCK? Whelps- left side! Even side, many whelps! NOW, HANDLE it!

FUCK!

That's a FUCKING 50 DKP minus! What the FUCK was that SHIT?

If you stand in the right fucking place, there is NO WAY you are going to FUCKING get into the GODDAMNED whelps, whatever fucking FEAR, Tailswipe- whatever the FUCK! Okay?! It's like one in a fucking million!

From the- fucking north corner, to the middle, into the fucking Whelp cave, it's not even FUCKING remotely imaginable!

(end)

From Alachas1985's YouTube entry: The audio was created by "Dives" from Wipe Club, I had nothing to do with its creation, I only made the animation. Cheers to the guys from "Wipe Club" (http://www.wipeclub.eu) for making the sound clip!

Cheers indeed!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Renzie's Classic Gaming: No One Lives Forever 2: A Spy In HARM's Way

On today's Renzie's Classic Gaming, we shed the spotlight on No One Lives Forever 2: A Spy In HARM's Way, or more simply, NOLF 2, a campy yet innovative and stylish first-person shooter released by Fox Interactive in late 2002.

I must have played it in the first half of 2003 or so- and enjoyed it immensely. NOLF 2 is the sequel to the 2000 Action Game of the Year No One Lives Forever- which was a very refreshing take on first-person shooters. Think Austin Powers, but you have a female lead- Cate Archer- and having its own brand of humor, still poking fun at the old spy movies of the 60's and 70's.

What pleased a lot of people was how more highly-polished NOLF 2 was, greatly improving upon the already great game that No One Lives Forever was. Also worked in is a decent role-playing element which allows you to customize Cate by building up her stealth, marksmanship or stamina- by spending skill points which you acquire through the course of the game.

As a spy action shooter, you could choose to be more subtle, and go stealthy- accomplishing your mission goals with minimum collateral damage. Or you could go all out, guns-ablazing and leaving a satisfyingly high body count.

Not that the stealthier way is less satisfying. In fact, a lot of the fun in NOLF2 involves sneaking up on your enemies and then eavesdropping in on some hilarious cleverly-written dialogue.

Even the friendlies have funny lines, particularly so when you try to engage them in conversation multiple times.

However you choose to get your mission goals accomplished, get ready for lots of action in NOLF2- you get to ride snowmobiles, use a variety of weapons and even bring Ms. Archer's purse-ful of high-tech gadgets into play.

OK, probably more wacky than high-tech. Cate Archer's quirky tools of the trade- are mostly cute and female-oriented: lipstick cameras, nail-clipper lockpicks and torches disguised as a can of hairspray. Watch out for the exploding robot kitties!

NOLF2 is powered by the Jupiter incarnation of the LithTech Engine. Check out No One Lives Forever 2: A Spy in HARM's Way by checking out the official website on nolf2.sierra.com, or by simply unearthing your old copy and playing it all over again!

You could also visit the NOLF2 wikipedia entry here, or its review, as well as tech specs and pics on Gamespot, here.

If you're already playing No One Lives Forever 2: A Spy in Harm's Way, check out the gameguides and FAQs here, on GameFAQS.com, if you need it.

Classics- I call them great moments in PC and console gaming. Truly memorable gaming masterpieces from years gone by. Games so good, you can install them onto your PC today and still have a good time. This has been another Renzie's Classic Gaming feature on Get Your Game On: Renzie on Gaming.

Cheers, everyone!

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